4 questions to answer God’s call

Time alone in prayer is an essential first step in discerning how God is calling you. 

How do you hear God’s call in your life? How do you understand what you hear?

These questions have been asked throughout the ages and continue to be asked by all who seek to discern God’s presence and call in their lives. In scripture there are many examples of people struggling to understand God’s call to them.

Consider the story of the call of Samuel (1 Sam. 3:1-10). Samuel was a young boy serving in the temple when he heard a voice calling his name. He assumed this voice was that of the priest, Eli. Eventually Eli realized that Samuel was hearing God’s voice calling to him and instructed him to respond, “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.” Samuel needed Eli to tell him that the voice he heard was God’s. He didn’t recognize God’s voice on his own.

Or the story of Andrew and the other disciple when they were with John the Baptist. John sees Jesus walking by and points out, “Behold the Lamb of God.” With that the two disciples of John follow after Jesus and become his disciples (John 1:35-40). They needed John the Baptist to point out Jesus to them. Then, they could follow and respond.

When you seek to discover God’s call in your life, you enter a time of discernment. The dictionary defines discern as: “to separate, to sort out, to sift through.” Religious discernment is also a time to see with the eyes of your heart so that you can choose life in God. It is a time when you allow yourself to be open to God’s will, and it is an opportunity to allow your heart to guide your mind more than only trusting your reasoning.

1. What do you hear?

While discernment has many parts, there are four basic steps to discovering one’s vocation. The first is a call to become aware. You are called to listen to God, to yourself, and to those around you.

If you are to listen to God, then prayer is essential. You need to take time to be in conversation with God, to ask God for help and guidance. Look to the life of Jesus to see the prominent place of prayer in discernment. In the gospels, before every major decision Jesus went off alone to pray. He did this prior to choosing the 12 apostles, and he spent much time in prayer as he prepared for his Passion and death.

While you need time alone, you also can find God’s voice in the voices of those around you. Your call is not for you alone. While you may grow personally and your relationship with God may develop as a result of your call, your vocation is always a call for others, a call to be of service to others, a call to pray for others.

Gail, a young woman considering religious life, says, “Without the voices of others, I know I would not be where I am today in my spiritual process. God has sent me ‘voices’ throughout my life, people that I may have only known for a short time and others I have known for a long while. I feel so alive and filled with love when we have spiritual talks. It is their voices echoing mine that bring light and peace into my life.”

2. What do you need to know?

The second step in discovering your vocation is to gather information and investigate the many options in front of you. Another young woman, Nicole, says, “As I discern God’s call in my life, I find that the perspective and input from people who know me in a vast array of settings helps me to gain deeper insight and self-knowledge. For each person whose life path has connected with my own, I have been enlightened to my weaknesses as well as uncovered some of my hidden strengths.”

Discerning a call to religious life is a two-way street. It calls for mutual discernment—on the part of the individual as well as the community. Just as with marriage, entering a religious community involves two parties, and both are called to be open and honest in order to discern if God is calling someone to join a particular community or not.

During this step it can be extremely helpful to have a spiritual director, someone with whom you can share your prayer, your relationship with God, your questions, and your fears. A spiritual director can help you sort and sift and discover where God may be leading you. Jennifer recalls how her own spiritual director has helped her and challenged her in her discernment of a vocation: “My spiritual director introduced me to communities that I would not have necessarily visited and to new ways of praying and worshiping our God. He encouraged me and pushed me out of my comfort zone to truly be what God had created me to be. He has helped me to be the best ‘me’ I could be.”

If you are discerning a call to a particular community, part of this step involves conversing with the community’s vocation director. “It is a real blessing to find a vocation director whose only agenda is to listen and to help you listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit within you and the respective community,” Hillary says. “One such vocation director I met with really helped me to probe both myself and the life that I was discerning. She never pushed me one way or the other, but through many visits and conversations, I found plenty of affirmation and encouragement to stay open to this calling.”

3. Where is God leading you?

Discernment calls for patience on all our parts. There is usually not a quick answer to the various questions posed. Take time to pay attention to the Spirit’s movements within you. Eventually though, you do need to choose—to make a decision. This is the third step of discernment.

This step calls you to choose what you sense to be God’s will as you can best understand it at this moment. You can’t expect your decisions to be always right or that you will be 100 percent certain when you do make your decision. Rather, you are called simply to make the decision that you believe will lead you to become the most loving person you can be, to become the person God created you to be.

4. What happens now?

The fourth step of discernment follows this time of making a choice, and it is a critical step in the process: You look for confirmation of your choice.

While some may support you in your choice, you may also encounter those who disagree with your decision and try to persuade you to do otherwise. At these moments it is important to pay attention to what happens within you. Do you find your choice weakening, or do you find it strengthened, even in the face of adversity? Sometimes such negative reactions actually can help strengthen your resolve.

If, however, after making a choice, you find yourself feeling more and more uneasy or even get sick physically, you may need to look more deeply again. Is this a simple case of the jitters? Or is your body trying to tell you that you’ve not made a good choice? Again, at such moments, the guidance of a spiritual director is imperative. A lack of confirmation may be a call to reconsider your choice. Such a time of reconsideration may then lead you to a different choice. Or it could simply point out where you’ll need extra support as you continue living out your decision.

Lynn is a member of a large family and has a grown son herself. She recently told her family that she is considering a call to religious life. She says, “My son was surprised, but over time he seems to be OK. My father is a good old Irishman who just couldn’t contain his pride. My mother is not so happy about this at all. She can’t see, as I do, that everything I’d be doing as a sister would be by choice and would make me happy; that it wouldn’t be a sacrifice. Most of my close friends don’t understand it at all, but they are so supportive and see it makes me happy. Most of them have the same questions that I’ve already asked. That’s great, because it gives me a second chance to talk about my own concerns.”

While discernment requires that you spend time alone in prayer and conversation with God, you also need other people to help you sort out the fruits of your prayer, to help show you the way to follow God’s call. As members of the body of Christ, you need one another to uncover your talents and abilities. You need the other members of the body to assist you on your journey and, at times, to show you the way. We are all members of a community, a family of faith. Your discernment in life, therefore, leads you naturally into that community, not away from it. God uses those around you to lead you, to guide you, to spur you into action.

Listen well

Discernment takes a lot of energy. Listening is not easy! Like Samuel, you are likely to hear God’s call several times before you realize who is calling. But with the help of your friends, your family, and your community of faith, you can find where God’s call is leading you. Your task is to listen well and once you’ve heard God’s voice, to follow it, as did the disciples of John—following Jesus who asks each of you, “What are you seeking?” 

A version of this article originally appeared in VISION 2007.

Related article: VocationNetwork.org, “Stopping long enough, I heard God’s call.”